What?!!!  What?!!!  Justin Morneau?!!  They must be kidding.  Have the majority of the so-called ‘baseball writers’ completely lost their minds?  Or should we be asking, were they of sound mind to begin with?  The only explanation for this highway robbery of the MVP is that the non-Jeter voters are ******, idiots, imbeciles, maybe even lunatics.  Choose one.  Most likely they all apply.  Oh, and one more…envious.  Envious of all that he has and all that he is which, in baseball terms, is just about the most completely skilled and clutch performing shortstop of our time.  Shame on you who did not vote for this man in this, his greatest year.  Can you read?  Do you own a TV?  Do you live in a cave?

So let me get this straight.  Derek Jeter misses winning the batting title by a bloop and a dribbler.  This, despite batting from the right side 2 feet farther from first base than it will ever be for Mauer or Cano.  This, despite having about a billion more plate appearances for the season than Mauer or Cano.  And this despite batting in the #2 hole where his mission was so often only to move Johnny Damon another 90 feet to third…by a bunt or a slicing groundball to the right side  Oh, and one more ‘despite.’  Jeter played half his games under the microscope and inside the pressure cooker called Yankee Stadium/

New York City


And Morneau?  A simple equation will do:  good hitter + artificial surface + high school outfield dimensions = very good offensive season.  Give him the Central Division Co-Slugger of the Year Award with Jerome Dye.  End of story.  We wish.

To continue.  I now ask any and all esoteric baseball statistics geeks and nerds to rally ‘round and supply the necessary computation to prove my point.  I would try to do it but, I must admit, I am not up to the task.

Here it is.  First, add up the obvious – Jeter’s runs scored and rbi’s.  Then dissect the season’s box scores and come up with his run/game saving fielding plays, the times he kept a 2 out rally going which eventually scored a run, the times he successfully gave up his at bat to move a runner over, his go-ahead hits, his game tying hits, his game winning hits and his timely stolen bases (now, exactly how many times was he caught stealing this year?).  Are you with me so far?  Good.  Then take into account how he almost single handedly carried the team for the first half of the year with Matsui and


the newest members of the broken wrist club, and how as Yankee Captain, he often played hurt, bruised, and injured.  How he set the example for the likes of Andy Phillips, Melky Cabrera, Nick Green and Sal Fasano (not exactly 200 million dollar payroll names) who so often came through in a regular season which tied the inferior National League Mets for the best record in baseball.  Now throw into the mix, the over-all sub-par Yankee pitching, playing short next to anyone of 4 or 5 different second sackers, and being subjected daily to the doom and gloom of the “Poor Me” A-Rod Traveling Choke Artist Show.

Got all that?  There might be even more.  If you think of anything else such as ‘Jeets’ being the poster boy for all the Yankee-hating fans, media, and opposing 95 mph hurling chin-musicians, then throw those into the mix too. 

Now, when all this is compiled and Jeter’s stellar blue collar performance is put up against Morneau’s politically correct spring, summer, and fall in the Make Believe World of Minneapolis & St. Paul, take a quick trip up to The Mistake in the Land of Lakes, that ballpark wannabe, and tear apart a piece of the right field ‘wall.’  Then take a few steps back and a deep breath in and use the trash bag liner for what it was intended – a  receptacle for the secret ballots of the non-Jeter for MVP voting baseball ‘writers.’  You know, garbage.


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